Friday, October 30, 2020

Traveling in the Light

Earlier this year, I was forced to leave my home in Wichita, Kansas and take a travel nurse position because of COVID-19.  Contrary to what anyone would have predicted during a global pandemic; contract nursing, per diem nursing and travel nursing contracts were terminated in central Kansas as all elective procedures, tests and surgeries were cancelled.  Contributing to the lack of need for contract nurses was that people feared going to the hospital this past spring, and being exposed to COVID-19.



Having travel nursed in the state of Washington the two previous years, I chose the Seattle area as my destination and was fortunate to find a cardiac telemetry contract in an excellent hospital, but for the first time I would be in the "float pool".   Float pool nurses agree to be sent to virtually any unit in the hospital, except for labor/delivery and pediatrics, which are units that require specific training and certification.

My 13 week travel contract was executed with a hospital east of Lake Washington which had 10 different units where I eventually "floated", sometimes three times during a 12 hour shift.  Adding to the stress of residing and navigating in a new city and hospital, was attempting to learn to work on 10 different units in the hospital, including units that cared for COVID-19 patients.  

Float pool nursing requires knowing specific protocols and procedures for each unit, such as the stroke protocols and requirements on the admitting stroke floor in the hospital.  In addition, floating requires learning where all equipment, medication and supplies are kept on each unit, along with the names and jobs of staff from housekeepers to patient care techs, fellow RNs and charge nurses, all whom you have never seen before, and are wearing masks continuously.  

Every morning, I would arrive at the hospital at 6:30 am, don mask and goggles in my car, enter the hospital, answer the obligatory covid questions and have my temperature taken before reporting to the staffing office, where the list of float pool nurses and their assignments was posted on the bulletin board, just like the list of homecoming candidates in high school.  As I walked down the hallway, I prayed for favor and grace in my assignment for the day.  The first days and weeks of this assignment were emphatically the most stressful of my nursing career.

Oftentimes, even though I was on the schedule for the day, my name wasn't on the list and I'd have to enter the staffing office and ask to be assigned for the day.  Frequently as well, I would walk to the unit assigned on the list only to be told I was floating to a different floor on the other side of the hospital.  This was a stressful and anxiety-inducing time because I knew noone on the floors and oftentimes was ignored by the charge nurses when I reported to the units.  I chalked their indifference to the pressures and tension created during the global health pandemic created by the coronavirus.

Many friends checked in with me during the first weeks of my relocation and new assignment and my kind, supportive brother lent a listening ear as I called him from the car every night after my 12 hour shift, processing the highs and lows of my days as a float pool nurse in a new hospital.  

My prayers for favor and grace were heard as I made friends on the various units of the patient care techs, nurses and other travelers who helped me find supplies, locate equipment, figure out how to contact doctors and most importantly deliver care and advocate for my patients.

The single common thread throughout this assignment, which I extended from 13 weeks to a total of 26, were the people who needed care during the tension and uncertainty of a global pandemic, during which visitors were not allowed in the hospital and many patients were afraid for their lives.  Many of my patients expressed their fears and needed a listening ear and comforting touch during their hospital stay.  I was blessed to happily provide these reassurances and thankful that I worked in an essential industry in a job that allowed me to interact freely and closely with others who needed my care.  

I have been thankful each and every day, no matter how trying the assignment I had, for being able to continue to work closely with others and care for the most vulnerable and at-risk people this year.  I am ever grateful to be a nurse and so very humbled to be a part of the force of healthcare providers and essential workers each year, but especially during the challenges and uncertainty of 2020.  

Wednesday, March 30, 2016

God Moves in Mysterious Ways



God Moves in Mysterious Ways
“God moves in a mysterious way,
His wonders to perform;
He plants his footsteps in the sea,
And rides upon the storm.
Ye fearful saints, fresh courage take,
The clouds ye so much dread
are big with mercy, and shall break
In blessings on your head.
Judge not the Lord by feeble sense,
But trust him for his grace;
Behind a frowning providence,
He hides a smiling face.”

This is just three verses of this beautiful profound hymn that God placed on my heart this week. 

I am a cardiology nurse on a floor where we monitor our patients’ hearts with a wireless telemetry “box” attached to 5 leads on their chest.  We are a cardiac floor, but occasionally cancer patients are admitted to my floor.
I almost always am assigned the cancer patients by chance……   God moves in a mysterious way.  

By God's grace, a beautiful woman was admitted to my floor who had breast cancer 19 years ago and just during the past year, the cancer metastasized to her liver, lungs and brain.  Her comment to me, over and over, as I admitted her last Monday night was, “I can’t do this anymore”.  She was weak, in pain, couldn’t breathe without supplemental oxygen and had a horrible headache that would not go away… most likely from the lesions in her brain.

As I admitted her to the floor, I did everything that I could to make her comfortable.  Earlier this fall, she had agreed to a clinical trial of a new drug for breast cancer metastases, which she believed made her worse.  She was done.   I told her that I had been through treatment for cancer and that I knew a little about the way she was feeling

I got her heated blankets, because when you are on chemo, you are freezing all the time.  I got her extra pillows for her arms, back and bottom, because when you have lost so much weight during chemo, there is no fat on your butt or bones for padding and it literally hurts to sit in a chair or bed or a bathtub.   I got her crackers and mashed potatoes, because those were the only things that she could stand to eat. 

I did everything that I could possibly think of to make her comfortable, and I called the doctor and got her the strongest pain meds possible for her excruciating headache.   She confided to me that she has an adult handicapped daughter at home.  I cannot begin to explain why God would allow this woman to have cancer.

But I can, just for one shift, empathize with her, listen to her, and try to do the simplest of things to make her more comfortable.

Thank you, dear Lord for placing me in the most humbling, gratifying position of being a nurse to the sick, the poor, the elderly and the homeless.   I am truly blessed beyond all possible measure.   And every day, I am grateful.

 
William Cowper was a British poet and hymnist. He struggled throughout his life with depression, doubts, and fears.

Sunday, September 6, 2015

Make me a blessing!






Today, our pastor spoke about “living by faith in future grace”.   “Jesus will supply us with everything we need to remain faithful to God.”  

Living by faith is the most fulfilling, blessed way to live.   I am so grateful that God has provided me with a wonderful job and place to live, friends and family.   I have everything that I need to remain faithful to God.   God shows me every day why he brought me through the trials in my past and I am eternally humbled and blessed to be used by God to help those less fortunate, the sick and the helpless.   

Every day that I go to work as a nurse, I am humbled by the pain and suffering of others.   I am not always patient or kind.   I am not always perfect in the care that I give to others.  Sometimes, I am not even nice to a patient who is being very difficult in the depths of their illness.  For that, I am ashamed.

But every single day, God gives me the honor of being a blessing to someone by kindly and compassionately caring for them.   I cannot thank Him enough for supplying me with everything that I need and for choosing me to work in the most trusted profession in the world, as a nurse.

There are times at work, when I am so imperfect that I question being trusted with the task of caring for others.   But I remain strong in my faith, even when fears and doubts creep in, I stand on the promises that God has given to me, because I know that He who promised me is ever faithful.   I would be absolutely nothing without the Grace of God.  

There are also times, because of fatigue and soreness, I am not grateful.   I pray that God will continue to remind me of all that I have to be grateful for, and all the blessings that are mine through Christ Jesus.  

Today, I thought about this hymn, and I try to make it my prayer every day, “Make me a blessing, make me a blessing.   Out of my life, let Jesus shine.   Make me a blessing, Oh, Lord, my God.   Make me a blessing, to someone today.”
 

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Don't ever give up





Be someone’s inspiration.  If I have touched one life in a positive way in this past year, then my life has had purpose and meaning.
Be someone’s support.   Reach out to someone in need and show them that you care.


As I look back on the past two years, I see that I am living proof that God fulfills His promises and that He heals and performs miracles.


In March of 2013, after Allie left for Thailand and my mother passed away, God called me to become an RN so that one day I can work in Nicaragua helping those who have limited health care.   On April 2, 2013, I began taking the prerequisite classes I needed to complete before entering the accelerated Bachelor of Nursing program at Mid-America Nazarene University. 



On April 2, 2015, I completed the background check, drug screen and paperwork for my first job as a Registered Nurse at Rose Medical Center on their cardiac/telemetry floor, which was my first choice as a job.   God is so good.
During the course of those two years, God provided multiple homes for me with close friends, He provided funding for my schooling and living and medical expenses.   Most importantly God gave me the strength and wisdom to pass my nursing school classes.    And, finally, God redeemed the diagnosis of breast cancer I received in my last module of nursing school and completely healed me of all cancer.   After nine months of treatment, there is no cancer in my body and I am ready to start work as an RN.


During my treatment for cancer, I learned what it is like to be a patient and to undergo painful, traumatic, and sickening treatments. I know these experiences will make me a more compassionate nurse.   I had a port placed in my chest to deliver chemotherapy directly to my heart.   I had to shave my head as my hair started falling out.   I had to complete my final clinicals while taking the worst chemo that I know of, the “red devil”, and I survived.  Upon returning to Colorado, I took a three week break from chemo to take and pass the NCLEX.  I then resumed chemo every week for 12 weeks.   After my surgery in January, in which no trace of cancer was found in my breast tissue, I began radiation during my new grad residency program and had to get up at 5:30 every day to get radiation before my training and clinicals started.   After radiation, my skin on my shoulder and breast became burned and blistered, but I healed.

Throughout it all, the love, kindness, compassion, mercy and generosity of my friends and family sustained me and carried me through.  “Every day I am reminded that our life’s journey is about the people that touch us.”  Stuart Scott


The love of God and the promises He has given me, kept me going when I did not feel like continuing the horrible cancer treatments.   



And, now, all His promises have been fulfilled.   I am an RN, I am healed of cancer, my joy is restored.   I am grateful and humbled by the mighty power of God and by the love of my friends and family.



Friends, family, teachers, mentors:



YOU ARE MY INSPIRATION.



“Don’t give up.  Don’t ever give up.”  Jim Valvano



“You beat cancer by how you live, why you live and the manner in which you live. “  Stuart Scott



 “For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you, and not to harm you.   Plans to give you a hope and a future. “  Jeremiah 29:11



"Do not call to mind the former things, Or ponder things of the past. 19"Behold, I will do something new, Now it will spring forth; Will you not be aware of it? I will even make a roadway in the wilderness, Rivers in the desert.”  Isaiah 43 :18-19